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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  January 15, 2013 11:35pm-12:35am PST

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reason, it feels like it's nine degrees outside. we had an outdoor concert last night, people were wearing uggs on their heads. we're delicate people. even our kids are delicate. our local news went to an elementary school in burbank yesterday. apparently -- watch these kids. apparently they're freezing. it's sunny and almost none of their jackets are zipped up. >> on the playground, students layered up for lunch and recess. >> my fingers get numb and it's hard to pick things up. >> drake pictures himself somewhere else when it gets this cold. >> i'd rather be somewhere, like, in chicago where it's always hot. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's an l.a. public school. sorry, everyone in chicago. facebook made a big announcement this morning. ceo mark zuckerberg held a press conference to announce that if you post one more picture of your cat sleeping, they're going to delete your account. cut it out. he introduced a new feature
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called graph search. graph search delivers search results that are more customized by incorporating information from your network of facebook friends, so you can ask questions like who are my friends that live in san francisco? and it will ask -- which, by the way, if you have to ask that, you don't have any friends in san francisco. it's an interesting new feature. soon you'll be able to find anything you want on facebook, except for the thousands of hours of your life you lost going on facebook. lindsay lohan today was arraigned -- not arrested. that's tomorrow. [ laughter ] was arraigned on charges of lying to police after a car accident in santa monica back in june. she told police her friend was driving the car, but police believe that she was the driver. lindsay did not appear in court. her lawyer went on her behalf and went possibly for the last time, because according to "tmz," lindsay fired her, her long-term attorney yesterday morning. after all the trouble she's been in, lindsay lohan has only spent
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a total of 15 days in jail. this lawyer shouldn't be fired. she should get an award p at least get one of those necklaces or something. i don't know what the story behind it is, but i do not like the way lindsay handled this. i mean shawn holly has been there for her for a long time, and if you have a problem with someone, you tell them. you have a conversation with them face to face. what you don't do is run them over with your car. that's what you don't do. it's just rude. president obama is very focused right now on gun control. obama is about to propose legislation that would limit access to assault weapons and strengthen background checks on people who buy guns. and of course he's getting a lot of opposition for those who believe their rights under the second amendment are being taken away. >> part of the challenge that we confront is that even the slightest hint of some sensible responsible legislation in this
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area fans this notion that somehow, here it comes and that everybody's guns are going to be taken away. >> jimmy: basically what he's saying is people flip out when they think their guns are being taken away. some lobbyists will try to whip them into a frenzy with ads like this one. >> why does president obama want to take everybody's guns away? >> everybody's guns are going to be taken away. >> that's right. the federal government is about to take your guns away. >> the federal government's about to take all your guns away. >> whose guns? >> everybody's guns. >> how many guns? >> all your guns. >> call the white house right now, because if you don't -- >> here it copmes. >> here it comes. paid for by americans against congress. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: last night on nbc, they had a new episode of the show "the biggest loser." what a program that is. they put a bunch of fat people
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in spandex and yell at them for an hour. a contestant named pam had a dramatic weigh-in ceremony last night. she was required to lose more than six pounds to make sure her team was safe from elimination that week. and here you go. as chris harrison would say, get ready for the most dramatic weigh-in ceremony yet. >> please, please, please. >> ahh! i did it! i did it! that's right, that's right. >> jimmy: no, i'm okay. well, she looks great. [ laughter ] remember when nbc used to have "the cosby show"? ryan seacrest is busy right now. even busier than usual. ryan seacrest is hosting not
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one, but two shows this week. a new season of "american idol" premieres tomorrow night on fox, and he's also narrating a pbs miniseries called pioneers of television. he has so little free time, he's actually sleeping in a tanning bed now. i mean, when does this guy even have time to whiten his teeth? it's unbelievable. i found out something interesting about ryan seacrest today. you know how at the beginning of every episode of "american idol," ryan says "this is "american idol"" with a very specific cadence. apparently he does that all the time. in fact, he even did it the last time he was here at our office. >> this is the back door at "jimmy kimmel live." this is a security guard. >> hi, can i see your i.d.? >> this is my i.d. this is the elevator. this is me getting on the
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elevator. find out which floor i get off on after the break. america voted. i'm getting off on the third floor. this is the men's room. this is guillermo walking out of the men's room. how'd it go in there? >> i think it went good. >> this is guillermo's fly open. that's better. this is jeff. this is jeff's last day. >> what? >> jeff, you are not safe from me pretending you're about to be fired. >> what's happening? >> you're safe! go stand over there. this is brad's computer.
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this is brad's power cord. >> what the [ bleep ]! get the hell out of here! >> this is me getting the hell out of here. this is me being pick up. this is me being put in a box. this is me being sealed in the box. this is me being put into a dumpster. seacrest out. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: ryan seacrest cannot be stopped. this is pretty funny. a family went to see the movie "les miserables" together. and after the movie, mom and dad were very emotional, it's a sad story. to help them get through it, one of the boys was nice enough to grab the cell phone, shoot video of them crying and post it to youtube. >> what was the saddest part, do you think? >> at the end, his eyes.
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he was old. i'm so upset. oh, my god. i can't talk about it. >> we've been to funerals. we've been to funerals of family members and cried less. >> jimmy: and that's why you should never have children. or at least don't give them cameras. [ applause ] the british newspaper called "the uk observer" has been conducting an interesting experiment. they asked a group of high profile investment managers to pick the stocks they thought would do best in 2012 and they also asked a cat to pick stocks. the cat picked stocks by throwing a toy mouse at a list of names. at the end of the year, wouldn't you know the cat made more money
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than any of the experts, quite a bit more, and they didn't have to pay him any management fees. they gave him some yarn, he was thrilled. while some companies might be embarrassed about the results, one big brokerage firm is actually embracing them. >> at charles schwab, we know your portfolio is more than your money. it's your future. that's why we replaced our entire trading staff with adorable kittens. and here we are at your office, little guy. there you go. oh, you're coming right at me, you savvy little investor you. ibm at 192.50. that's a good start. >> charles schwab. reliable. innovative. adorable. [ applause ] >> jimmy: it's adorable, right? keep them away from laser pointers. we're going to take a quick break. when we come back, lance armstrong, we're going to check in with our friends at the indian call center, rob lowe is
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here, bryce harper from the washington nationals and music from big boi, too, so come on back.
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>> jimmy: we're back. rob lowe, bryce harper from the washington nationals, and big boi are on the way. here's a headline that caught my eye this morning. a kid in florida was arrested for giving wedge gees. it was at a movie theater in florida. he allegedly started giving random people wedgies while his friend videotaped it. never trust anyone wearing a vest. the alleged wedgie giver is 18 years old, charles ross. apparently he pulls pranks like this a lot and posts them on youtube. why i don't condone what the kid
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did -- you know, when i grew up, remember what we called them? >> what's that? >> jimmy: murphys. some people called them melvins. but wedgie is the best. cleto used to give a lot of wedgies. mostly to me. i remember you giving me a wedgie so hard the elastic waistband came off and became a head band. >> i do remember that. i remember that one. >> jimmy: charles ross was released on a $750 bond and they told him if he ever returned to the theater, he'd be thrown in jail where he'd be forced to tell his fellow inmates where he was in for giving wedgies. a woman in chicago came up with a new invention some of you might be interested in. i have a hard time thinking a woman came up with this. it seems like a man thing. it's called a vapor teemy. the alcohol goes directly into your bloodstream.
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it's like a reverse breathalyzer, which that is quite an idea. dude, what if you could smoke beer? it sells for $35, which makes it a very affordable way to die. inhaling alcohol is dangerous. you get a lot drunker a lot faster, and if you get too drunk, it can look something like this. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: terrifying. be careful. [ applause ] you've probably heard the last couple days, lance armstrong is in confession mode right now. he did a two and a half-hour interview with oprah. he admitted to using performance-enhancing drugs to win the tour de france, which is big news for anyone who loves to hear people confess things everybody already knows about. but inside sources say he refused to come clean about the doping, but then he caved when oprah promised him a panini maker. some believe that this apology
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to oprah is nothing more than a ploy to win sympathy. i don't know. i happen to think it took a lot of ball to do that. [ laughter ] [ applause ] no, don't, because -- it was a cheap joke. and i'm sorry. you know, we've done a lot of jokes about lance armstrong over the years, and it's hard to come up with new stuff. fortunately, there's a company that we use from time to time, it's an overseas company that helps us write jokes. can we get them up. let's get them up on the video chat, if we can. how you doing? >> hello, lindsay lohan legal advice hotline. what crimes have you committed this time? >> jimmy: it's not lindsay lohan, it's jimmy kimmel calling. >> ah, mr. jimmy! hey, jimmy kimmel! jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy kimmel! >> hi, jimmy. a hearty congratulations for
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your move to 8:35 a.m. >> jimmy: oh, no -- well, it's actually -- oh, i see. you're in india. there's a time difference. here it's on at 11:35. >> oh, no, no, no. i watch you on tivo the next morning. we love guillermo. >> jimmy: they love you. >> i love you guys, too. >> jimmy: he says hi. i need some help, if you don't mind. >> how may we be of utmost service to you? >> jimmy: i was wondering if you had any jokes about lance armstrong. he's doing an interview with oprah on thursday. >> oh, yes. well, most definitely. we have many armstrong zingers to share. >> jimmy: oh, good. >> joke right there. >> jimmy: oh, wow. wow. roger, you look very different. >> hi, jimmy. >> jimmy: hi. >> i have jokes for you. >> jimmy: why do you look like that now?
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>> oh, i have been using just for man. five minutes and no more gray. >> jimmy: i don't think that's it. may i ask roger, have you been using steroids? >> i deny indications of doping! he is most offended. >> jimmy: i'm very sorry. does this mean he's not going to tell a joke? because we'd love to have a joke. i'm so sorry, roger. >> okay, okay. i cannot mad at you, jimmy. >> jimmy: you can't? okay, thank you, roger. >> give me a second, i will tell you the jokes. oprah. >> jimmy: okay. your shirt's a little unbuttoned there at the bottom. >> why did lance armstrong go on
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the oprah winfrey show? >> jimmy: i don't know, why did lance armstrong go on the "the oprah winfrey show"? >> because he thought he would have a ball. >> jimmy: it's not your fault, but i kind of did that joke already. i did that joke just before we spoke to you. a version of it. >> okay. what is the secret of mr. lance armstrong's success? >> jimmy: i don't know. >> he always stays positive. >> positive. for drugs. >> jimmy: yeah. i did get it. yeah, that was pretty good. do you have anything better? do you have something really good? >> do i have anything better? ahh! >> oh, no. he's roid-raging.
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>> jimmy: oh, goodness. he really is angry. he is furious. some of his fake muscles -- he's throwing fake punches. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we'll check back in with them next week. ladies and gentlemen, from the washington nationals rookie of the year bryce harper is here. we have music tonight from big boi. and we'll be right back with rob lowe. so stick around. what's better? faster or slower? [ all kids ] faster! ok, what's fast? um, my mom's car and a cheetah. okay. a spaceship. a spaceship. and what's slow? my grandma's slow. would you like it better if she was fast? i bet she would like it if she was fast. hm, maybe give her some turbo boosters. tape a cheetah to her back. tape a cheetah to her back? seems like you have thought about this before. [ male announcer ] it's not complicated. faster is better. and the iphone 5 downloads fastest on at&t 4g. ♪
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>> jimmy: tonight on the program -- this kid was on the cover of "sports illustrated" when he was 16 years old. from the washington nationals,
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his name is bryce harper, and he will be with us later tonight. and then, with music from this album called "vicious lies and dangerous rumors," big boi with some help from phantogram on our outdoor stage. tomorrow night, ray romano will be here. from "private practice," amy brenneman will be with us. and we'll have music from phillip phillips. and on thursday, mark wahlberg and science bob plfugfelder will be here to explode things. our first guest is a very successful film and television actor who -- if you all behave -- will be signing everybody's "st. elmo's fire" posters immediately after the show. he stars as jeff ashton in the lifetime movie "prosecuting casey anthony" this saturday. please welcome rob lowe. [ cheers and applause ] >> everybody, come in. come in. everyone. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. thank you.
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everybody, this is the el captain theatre. it was originally constructed in 1926. it is the currently the home of "jimmy kimmel live." hey, jimmy, how are you? >> jimmy: i'm doing good. what's -- >> the man show? >> jimmy: it's a different show. >> i have a new job, i lead hollywood tours in my spare time. i have my own company. it's called "lowe places." >> jimmy: oh. thank you. >> for 500 yen, guys, you can get a picture in jimmy's seat, if you like. >> jimmy: what? >> do you mind? >> jimmy: okay. >> thank you so much. >> jimmy: 500 yen, huh? >> one, two -- >> do you want me in this? >> closer, please. take off the mask. one, two, three. thank you. >> jimmy: rob? is everyone going to take a picture in the desk?
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hi, how are you? >> one, two, three -- fantastic. thanks, you guys. >> jimmy: so are they going to stay? >> no, no. tour's over. >> jimmy: the tour's over, everybody. go stand by guillermo over there. >> for you. >> jimmy: what does that translate from? >> got to give you a little taste. >> jimmy: it's good to see you. thank you for bringing your friends. >> i wanted to give back to the community. it makes me feel really good. >> jimmy: how have you been? >> i'm good, my friend. >> jimmy: family is good? >> they're good. my son is safely back to his second semester of college. i went and visited him. that was fun to be there. >> jimmy: does he have fun when you come to visit him in college? >> here's what i learned about college. the ac nielsen people do not
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accurately measure people in colleges, because if they did, my little show "parks and recreation" would be "two and a half men." >> jimmy: would be the number one show on television. they probably watch it on their computers. >> they do. and, let's face it, they're watching it drunk. >> jimmy: when you show up at the campus, the kids go nuts, and how does your son -- >> they do know some very obscure lines from my character, and my son can sort of -- he's like yawns. he's like dad, you're a nerd. >> jimmy: what about your dad? did he care about you and your success as an actor? is that something he was interested in? >> it's funny, because just like recently, we were talking about what it's like to raise kids, because i was famous at the exact age that my kids are now. and my dad was like oh, it was so hard. he lives in ohio. he's practiced law his whole life. he's an upstanding pill already of society. but he would go to buy the magazines that i was on the
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cover of, "16", "tiger beat", all these young pretty boys. >> jimmy: where did he go to buy them? >> somewhere in secret. >> jimmy: okay. >> they're looking at him like aren't you that lawyer? aren't you some kind of creepy pedophile? no, no, my son's on the cover. yeah, sure, buddy. >> jimmy: so dad was paging through "tiger beat." >> it never occurred to me. it's like me, bobby sherman, and christopher makepeace. >> jimmy: do you have those foldouts and win a dream date with rob? >> i sometimes come across them, and it's an embarrassment of hairdos. >> jimmy: it is. and do your kids look through that stuff and make fun of you? >> they don't need that to make fun of me. they need very, very limit prompting. >> jimmy: you brought a photograph here. i'm going to show this. you're catching a pass here, and who are you catching that pass from? >> that, i believe, is from number 12 andrew luck of the
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indianapolis colts, and that is in liucas oil arena from thursday's episode. i showed it to reggie wayne. i said i think your elbows need to be a little closer together. >> jimmy: well, he's picky. were you rooting for peyton manning? >> i was. i was. i was so depressed that the broncos lost. but now i go to tom brady. >> jimmy: you now go to tom brady? how does that work? >> it's very simple. i always support the pretty boys. >> jimmy: i see. [ laughter ] now, you tweeted something on december 31st, new year's eve. i'd like to read it. you said "duet with kenny loggins tonight, song danger zone, target destroy, like eardrums." what does that mean? >> i was at a party. this is sort hollywood soiree.
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seth macfarlane put a beatdown on frank sinatra. john mcenroe, the clash. eh. >> jimmy: what song did he do? >> eh. should i stay or should i go. he should have gone. [ laughter ] and kenny loggins was there and asked me to sing a duet. now, he wanted me to do "footloose" with him. >> jimmy: wow. he asked you to sing one of his songs with him. >> he clearly had had too much to drink. >> jimmy: wow. >> and i years ago auditioned for "footloose" and they had a dance audition and i blew out my acl. so i have posttraumatic stress with anything having to do with "footloose." i was like no, i won't do anything from that movie but i'll do "danger zone." >> jimmy: so you did "danger zone" with kenny loggins. >> which is a problem because the only lyric anybody remembers is "i went to the danger zone" and nobody remembers any of the other.
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he told me a great story. he said the lyrics are terrible. georgio, the big producer, didn't want to share lyric credit or pay any money so he gave the engineer $10 and said write the lyrics. absolutely true story. that's why they're awful. >> jimmy: what are the lyrics? i thought it was highway to the danger zone. i didn't realize it was i went to the danger zone. >> that's the chorus and that's the good part. that's what you want kenny loggins to sing. so i was stuck with the crap. burning down the highway -- >> jimmy: kenny loggins -- most people will not sing their karaoke songs in a karaoke situation. but kenny is right there for you. >> he's a trooper and he hasn't lost a step. he sounds great. >> jimmy: are you guys enjoying yourself? yes? okay. very good. we're going to take a quick break. >> i have the best clients. >> jimmy: you really do. rob lowe is here with us. we'll be right back. vacation is a precious thing.
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we have two aggravating circumstances that meet the state's requirement. one, we know caylee was killed by her own mother. two, it was a cold, premeditated murder proved by duct tape, chloroform in the trunk of the car, and the search history on the computer. i see no mitigation for mental illness or abuse. she's a psychopathic narcissist, but that doesn't make her mentally ill in the eyes of the court. >> jimmy: that is rob lowe.
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you play the prosecutor in this case. >> yeah, jeff ashton was a 30-year veteran who fought for victims like little caylee. 12-12 in death penalty cases. took one last case before he was going to retire, a case that everybody in the country saw one way, and he lost it. >> jimmy: he lost the case. >> well, i'm not sure he did. but how did it happen and how does a guy ever live with it? >> jimmy: i would blame it on him. no, i don't know anything about it. is it a case that you followed closely personally? >> i watch more cable news than any human being should be exposed to. i'm guilty. and you couldn't escape that case. the nation was riveted by it. i never could understand -- to me, it seemed like a slam dunk, and yet the only people that mattered, the jury, saw it completely differently. so this is a look at how it happened. >> jimmy: isn't that something how that happens? because i guess they are sequestered and they're cut off from everything. >> i think it's the first big
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trial in the era of twitter and facebook, and i think that's not insignificant. i think public opinion now moves at the speed of light, evidence gets leaked, and so you're trying to get a jury that doesn't have an opinion, so that either tells you they're not paying attention to the world, or they've heard everything and they still don't have an opinion, which is really bad for a prosecution. >> jimmy: yeah, i would think so. the good news is, this is what the real jeff ashton looks like. and now he's being played by you. >> i drew the line at the tie. >> jimmy: you wouldn't go with the tie? >> look, anne hathaway can cut off all the hair she wants. i'm not wearing those ties. >> jimmy: the tie seems to be making an attempt to escape from jeff. do you know jeff? >> i also think it's hard to be credible with a jury when you're wearing jerry garcia designed ties. >> jimmy: maybe that was the thing right there. maybe that will be a sequel to this thing. it's great to see you.
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congratulations on the tour company and all you have going. the movie is called "prosecuting casey anthony." it premieres this saturday night at 8:00 on lifetime. rob lowe, everyone. we'll be right back with bryce harper. we really love tailgating. a little more. there's a real, like, camaraderie in the parking lot... shut up! that's it! let's go in the car. my time to shine is the smoked pulled pork. i think it's done broseph! pretty much got it down to a science...
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>> dicky: if you're going to be in the l.a. area and want to see the show, call 866-jimmy-tix or go to jimmykimmellive.com. get the new "jimmy kimmel live" app, see what you've been missing. search jimmy kimmel in the itunes app store. or go to jklapps.com to get it now. our customized interview covers everything from a service member's deployment, to a student's loan interest, right down to a teacher's crayons. you've worked hard to earn your money. we're here to help you keep it. turbotax-- the power to keep what's yours. try it free at turbotax.com.
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>> jimmy: our next guest was on the cover of "sports illustrated" when he was only 16 years old. they called him "baseball's lebron james." and so far, they were right. last year, he was rookie of the year. and who knows, maybe he'll win it again? from the washington nationals, please welcome bryce harper. [ cheers and applause ] how are you? >> good, how are you? >> jimmy: i'm doing well. i have a lot of clown questions to ask you. >> perfect. you must be from toronto. >> jimmy: it's funny, it takes
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most people a lifetime to come up with a catch phrase that will be repeated over and over again, but you -- for those who didn't know -- you were asked a weird question bay reporter, and you said that's a clown question, bro. and it instantly became a catchphrase, all over the internet. even senate majority leader harry reid used it. i think we have that. >> i don't want to answer that question, that's a clown question, bro. >> jimmy: that's got to be crazy for you. especially being from nevada. that's your senator from your home state. >> yeah, i didn't expect that. i don't know if i'm a politician i'd use that, but i guess he's a big fan. >> jimmy: i tell you something, i too -- i was very excited about you, and i've been following your career because i'm from las vegas, you're from las vegas, and there aren't a lot of -- there are a lot of people from las vegas, but not too many of them really do anything. [ laughter ] >> yeah, i lived in the
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caesar's. >> jimmy: do people ask you stupid questions like that? >> yeah, i get it all the time. oh, you're from vegas. you must live in a casino. no, i live in a house with a roof and two dogs. >> jimmy: people don't understand. they think you were raised if a tiger cage. >> i told somebody i lived on the pirate ship at treasure island and they actually believed me. >> jimmy: did you hang around on the strip as a kid? did you go down there? >> no, not much. when you live there, you let everybody else come and gamble and pay all their money and let them build more casinos there. >> jimmy: yeah, maybe stop by for the 99 cent shrimp cocktail once in a while. >> yeah, sunset station is great. who's going to vegas, the 22-year-old? >> jimmy: yeah, there are some people going to vegas. >> whoo! [ applause ] >> jimmy: uh-oh. watch out. you'll wind up in the fountain with bryce. >> yeah, exactly. >> jimmy: you're 19 years old, you get called up to majors. what do you remember about that?
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who told you, how did it happen? >> i went into my coach's office, it was actually snowing. i was in syracuse, pretty similar weather to here. it's freezing right now. but i went in there and my coach said hey, you got a shot to go up to l.a. and join the club up there. i was really excited about that because it's so close to home. and i was thinking you were going to be there, but you weren't. >> jimmy: i didn't know. no one invited me. >> that's terrible. no, i'm just kidding. my family was there. it was a great moment for me and my family and friends to be able to get there so easily. >> jimmy: next day you're at dodgers stadium. >> yeah, it was surreal. i had a seven-hour flight and all i could think was you better not look like an idiot. >> jimmy: you sure did. your first at-bat -- we have video of your first at-bat. you see in slow motion you doubled, and the guy behind you -- [ laughter ]
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made it especially memorable. hanging a moon in the background. >> i guess the full moon comes out when things are going good. >> jimmy: are you aware when you're playing what's going on in the stands? do you have any awareness of what's happening? >> no, not much. you kind of try to not think about that. it's hard to worry about the fans as you're facing billingsley. i wish that guy would have let me sign his butt or something. >> jimmy: it's not too late. we can round his butt up for you. now, you also -- when you were a kid, you slept with your baseball bat, which is -- that's a real commitment. and then you and the bat broke up? or what happened? you don't sleep with the bat anymore. >> i actually hit it off the wall and got my face. you can see the scar. when i was growing up, i was really superstitious. i still am. >> jimmy: what do you do? do you have rituals that you go through? oh, my goodness. >> during the day, i get to the
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field around 12:00 for a 7:00 game. i shower seven times and i don't even need to. as long as we're on a streak, i'm going to keep doing the same thing. wearing the same undershirt. i eat eggo waffles. it has to be eggo. >> jimmy: that's a lot of showering. >> pb and honey. >> jimmy: it seems to be working. whatever it is that you're doing. maybe cut down to six showers a night. >> i got to be clean, right? >> jimmy: i will say, you smell great. >> thank you. you do, too. you smell fabulous. >> jimmy: well, congratulations to you. it's great to meet you. i hope you have a great career. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: i'm sure we're going to be seeing a lot more of you. i have a sneaking suspicion that sometime tomorrow, you'll be getting a call from the eggo people. [ laughter ] a giant truckful full of waffl headed your way.
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bryce harper, everyone. the nationals 2013 spring training home opener is february 24th against the florida marlins. we'll be right back with music from big boi.
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>> jimmy: his cd, "vicious lies and dangerous rumors" is out now. the song is called "c-p-u." here with some help from the band, phantogram, big boi. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ this is how we get down
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♪ and it is you that's on my computer screen 'cause it's you that's on my mind ♪ ♪ and it is you that's on my computer screen 'cause it's you that's on my mind ♪ ♪ 'cause it's you that's on my mind the world is yours as soon as you log on ♪ ♪ i'm long gone like the dro that's blown in the wind friend pretend that this life is but a dream then ♪ ♪ reality syncs in the fantasy begins and it never ends we like to role play ♪ ♪ throw on some coldplay go get some drugs and alcohol our whole day now we're trapped ♪ ♪ in the matrix while big brother out here making moves don't say ♪ ♪ and it is you that's on my computer screen 'cause it's you that's on my mind ♪ ♪ and it is you that's on my computer screen 'cause it's you that's on my mind ♪ ♪ 'cause it's you that's on my mind the information age age the age of information ♪
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♪ but we're still a slave so let me behave like a bring the goons go out and sell dope ♪ ♪ that's what they shoving down our throat so i choke and regurgitate truest lyrics i ever wrote folk ♪ ♪ my crew's locked out without the bandanas yet we keep it cracking like a egg yolk ♪ ♪ this is atlanta by way of west savannah and it is you that's on my computer screen ♪ ♪ 'cause it's you that's on my mind and it is you that's on my computer screen ♪ ♪ 'cause it's you that's on my mind 'cause it's you that's on my mind ♪ ♪ as i scroll through the centerfolds wishing that the screen was three dimensional ♪ ♪ i know it doesn't seem too conventional but it'll do until i get you in the physical ♪ ♪ as i scroll through the centerfolds wishing that the screen was three dimensional ♪ ♪ i know it doesn't seem too conventional but it'll do until i get you in the physical ♪ ♪ and it is you that's on my computer screen 'cause it's you that's on my mind ♪
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♪ and it is you that's on my computer screen 'cause it's you that's on my mind ♪ ♪ 'cause it's you that's on my mind ♪ atl blg on my mind come on

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